tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84173572011-07-28T18:31:36.856-07:00Maybenoreply@blogger.comBlogger3171100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-13310534614196156672007-09-20T17:42:00.000-07:002007-09-20T20:05:42.611-07:00

Over the years I have resented labels, as I find them confining, limiting, inaccurate, etc... I also have a huge belief that those that adopt a theme, be it punk, mod, hippy, what-have-you, often are adopting a set of values and styles without much consideration. Even being an artist or a musician comes with a prepackaged sort of identity.I could belong to the white-trash group. I let my kids

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-33118534765426285872007-09-16T15:54:00.001-07:002007-09-16T16:04:43.061-07:00

i'm hanging out it the backyard on the decrepit laptop that has to be plugged in at all times. the grass is high in places and there's red trike, an orange traffic cone, a kiddie pool, some solar ovens, a couch, a motorcycle, and other random items strewn about. all these things give me comfort. it's a lived in feel. a protest against over management, too much organization. it's a sort of

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-17077535471596492412007-09-12T15:36:00.000-07:002007-09-12T15:48:06.464-07:00

in the time it took me to start up the computer, jj managed to feed the potato chips that river had abandonded to skinner. the cat was not so interested in honey dijon kettle chips, so i guess he tried to feed them to his trike. potato chips all over the floor i mopped last night. and if that wasn't enough, while i cleaned them up he gave the victorian chair a milk facial.it's been a bit crazy

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-8883330960818458902007-08-16T18:36:00.000-07:002007-08-16T21:00:45.839-07:00

Sitting here staring at the overgrown grass ornamented with a fading second hand 70s couch and home to ol' Akira, it all reminds me so much of the Friendly Street Zoo I left nine years ago. Has it really been that long? So much has happened since then, I guess.Now I have a kid that's in grade school. The new baby is walking and talking. Time is dripping like a leaky faucet, seemingly

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-32052967610600716032007-07-02T21:38:00.000-07:002007-07-02T22:02:00.679-07:00

Every now and then I get to feeling like quitting smoking will be a wonderful experience. I'll breathe better, feel healthier, last longer, etc. Sometimes this illusion lasts more than a day or two. Usually it's easier to refrain from smoking after a particularly masochistic bender of a night. I usually swear off everything after six hours at a bar and three more hours at a party. Shit, I'm

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-54642864032445267832007-04-18T13:48:00.000-07:002007-04-18T14:00:06.751-07:00

It's after noon, time to crack open a beer and get to work measuring, sawing, sanding, screwing. Heh. The building is going slowly. Sometimes days go by without me in the yard covering myself with sweat, sawdust, and blood. But not today. Nearly finished with my upholstered bottom bunk bed crib conversion I let slide a screw that I'm driving, and Wham the phillips bit goes right through my

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-72209399258088995072007-03-27T19:45:00.000-07:002007-03-27T19:49:47.721-07:00

JJ took his first step today. It's very amusing watching him learn to stand on his own, especially since once he gets vertical he throws up his arms like I would at the top of Mt. Everest... as if I had any inclination to climb there, which I don't. He stands for a minute or so before going down again and if I'm within arms reach merely throws himself at me with squeals of glee. It's fucking

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-36737533413478098072007-03-13T15:11:00.000-07:002007-03-13T15:17:10.890-07:00

Sometimes you just want to strangle them.Enjoy shopping while you can. Even if you normally loathe those little errands you have to run. Live it up. It won't happen right away but soon enough, it just turns into sheer hell.Home Depot: Tantrum over beef jerky. "I hate you. I wish you never existed" Home Depot lines take forever and this went on for about fifteen minutes.Thrift store: The

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-10531131580349248452007-03-09T21:35:00.000-08:002007-03-09T21:51:35.350-08:00

junk bought on ebay this week: nada. although I was looking at hemp clothing and ipods. alas, too riche for me.song of the week: um..."my own personal penis".... a parody that popped in my brain and won't go away "something to jerk around. something i found"book of the week: white mercedes... phillup pullman, yup one and the same from the tripod series but different theme. quick read.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-30656614959000621862007-01-31T19:28:00.000-08:002007-01-31T19:39:31.436-08:00

My veins actually bulge out of head as i reach to obtain TDC, known to mechanics as Top Dead Center, the state of the piston in it's cycle of cylider combustion, but known to me as Total Decible Complaint in my status of motherhood and my less tender interactions with offspring... it shares similar characteristics. There is an explosion capable of creating a powerful tension that could drive a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1170138415901209392007-01-29T22:17:00.000-08:002007-01-31T09:31:13.853-08:00

squeeze the paint so hard. it's constipated and tender with hemroids of gook and grime. push it and force the birth of the fresh pigment puddled like blood in the harsh florescent light. it's stillborn and stiff in the cold silence that penetrates the tick tock of the clock and the poetry of hughes on the college station. it has no sense of time or culture. only flat and lifeless color

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1170130551573056202007-01-29T20:06:00.000-08:002007-01-29T20:15:51.590-08:00

two saturdays in a row spent at ghetto campus with a torch and some gas and a bunch of scrap metal. something about heating metal to red hot glowing states and watching the dripping liquid molten mess really gets me off in a teenage sort of way. welding rocks. so far i've just made one little sculpture. i've got to start scavenging for metal to snag and take to class with me.vandoom is on the

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1164436725790844402006-11-24T22:04:00.000-08:002006-11-24T22:39:46.326-08:00

you find yourself sitting outsideall alone in the middle of the nightyour eyes drift up into the skythe man in the moonhe's got a twinkle in his eyeand i'm wonderingwhat is he smiling aboutdoes he have a secret that i could find outi'm wonderingif it's really that goodwould he come down to earth if he couldhe'd think to himselfwhat am i doing down herethere must be a key to this madness

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1163826927608620322006-11-17T21:03:00.000-08:002006-12-01T15:29:09.363-08:00

junk bought on ebay this week: mostly presents i can't post yet. but the shit kicks asstheme song of the week: these boots were made for walkingbook of the week: mostly hamless, doug adamscurrent outfit: barter fair shirt and garage sale scored patch-pants with my new embelishements including emroidering theme song of week to the bottoms and jolly rogerwhat's driving

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1163477864004897192006-11-13T20:11:00.000-08:002006-11-14T15:15:39.010-08:00

Great weekend in the Southeast of Arizona. Buckster and Prince and I stayed in a nice B & B up about thirty stairs from a narrow winding road beneath stilt houses falling off the cliffs. It was sublime. Art and my kind of small town people with a minimal amount of cheese and tourists. I could live there. But this afternoon we came exhausted and happy back into Tucson.I have good speakers in my

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1162613760178010242006-11-03T20:09:00.000-08:002006-11-06T09:00:37.220-08:00

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1162095731113078242006-10-28T21:06:00.000-07:002006-10-28T21:22:11.136-07:00

the smell of bread is permeating the house, seeping into the cracks and holes in the walls, creeping like a ghost through the ducts, getting comfortable in my favorite reading chair. the boys are all sleeping and only the pets are restless. i am finishing off the last of the wine. it's called peachy something and it seems fitting that it's coming to an end. the summer is over. it's cold

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1161310799144247402006-10-19T19:10:00.000-07:002006-10-22T12:23:30.280-07:00

they led me to a little room with a padded bench. "take off everything and put on these gowns. one so that it opens forwards, the other back." i slipped my copy of the life of pi in a locker along with my clothes, boots, and other random belongings and then sat and waited in a sterile looking room. the nurse came and led me to a room with a giant plastic donut in the center. in the middle of

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1159347852702977222006-09-27T02:00:00.000-07:002006-09-27T02:04:12.726-07:00

girls night out. a success. got to dance to awesome west coast bands. slipped by cover charge. typing with one eye open doesn't work so well. good times. got home late. everybody asleep. good. no action though. oh well. i', m toasted.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1159252599300895992006-09-25T23:28:00.000-07:002006-09-27T10:01:04.386-07:00

A tiny gecko scrambled across the floor last night. I went to the kitchen and returned with a mason jar. It's hell to get a mason jar over a gecko without breaking the jar or hurting the lizard. But I did. It's western banded gecko. Three hundred bucks for my natural history class. I guess I better know. A little baby and it's tail was only half on and wriggling like a rock star's

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1158942458400844732006-09-22T09:16:00.000-07:002006-09-22T09:29:11.043-07:00

junk bought on ebay this week:onesie with stewie from family guy that says "get off your butt and do some parenting", leather boot laces, greatful dead boxers, legostheme song of the week:the new one I've been working onbook of the week:bukowski, south of no northcurrent outfit:ocf tank top. ripped up cutoffswhat's driving me nuts:i wish i could start ripping out walls in the kitchen and put the

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1158941772630741612006-09-22T08:49:00.000-07:002006-09-22T09:16:12.683-07:00

There's an all around good hovering about. Perhaps it's just a new coat of paint covering up termite infested timbers. But even if it is, it's nice to be deceived. Despite the fact that sleep deprevation is viewed as a form of torture, I've been maintaining my relative level of sanity. Mostly. The van of doom is still in the shop so we've been continuing on with our cabin fever. River and I

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1157652899754404732006-09-07T11:13:00.000-07:002006-09-22T08:47:39.900-07:00

thanks to anatomist, i'm now hooked on youtube now. here's my own silver screen site

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1157616729106335812006-09-06T23:57:00.000-07:002006-09-08T11:25:38.940-07:00

crazy world. under the almost full moon, a glass of wine and a pack of smokes. plugged the laptop into the end of the christmas light line. silent night simon and garfunkel echoes in the void of my brain. the day the music died. my cd player is caput. my turntable has a great new amp, but no speakers yet. so the gargle of the fountain, the hum of the crickets, the whirr of the fan inside,

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1157609911138208682006-09-06T23:12:00.000-07:002006-09-08T11:29:02.053-07:00

the doctor said its a cracked rib. lovely. and how did i aquire this injury, only the secong damaged bone in a long history of reckless behavior? perhaps it was the motorcycle. or wrestling a biker. or maybe a backflip gone bad (the only kind i know by the way). no. coughing was the culprit. how lame is that? i coughed so hard my rib broke. i didn't even get to have any fun doing it.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1156957810292423402006-08-30T10:05:00.000-07:002006-08-30T10:16:04.176-07:00

i managed to hit myself over the head with a two by four. this sounds difficult to do, especially by accident, but let me assure you, it's possible. i also pulled a muscle in my back. It feels like I have been impaled on a long spear, or maybe a bamboo squewer. if only someone would marinate me in some rum before i get grilled.buckster is prego.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1156481239841335952006-08-24T21:44:00.000-07:002006-08-28T09:27:47.220-07:00

it seems like the rest of the world has been abducted by aliens. everything is silent and still, hot stuffy, and static. but there is a bottle of decent wine left on the rack and they're playing the lost boys on tv, so i don't think i'll miss the world much tonight.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1155609206860006852006-08-14T19:26:00.000-07:002006-08-15T10:39:39.140-07:00

Now I too can join the compact world. I have my first laptop, second hand and working... so far. I can enter my little ideas into my little computer while smoking cigs and being eaten alive by little misquitos. Isn't it grand? I have been absentee as of late. I have an obsession with recycled art that keeps me busy during my spare seconds of the day. Will post pictures soon. I have to

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1151178538508046272006-06-24T12:38:00.000-07:002006-06-26T02:55:38.766-07:00

Jezebel, that black and beautiful bike of mine, has been giving me dirty looks from her tarnished chrome blinkers. I am working my hookups and bought some parts today and scheduled a hot sticky oil covered maintenance day tomorrow. It felt so good to ride her down to the shop and even better as I rode home again with my handlebars straight for the first time ever. It handles so much better.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1150752902117011312006-06-19T14:24:00.000-07:002006-06-19T14:35:02.176-07:00

at this time of year, when the populace revert to vampiric habits, hiding from the sun in their airconditioned coffins, one can hardly be blamed for following the mainstream and sulking inside whilst nursing a beer. it's 102 degrees today, with a high prediction of 110. i have two weeks left in the hot box with no working car, no pool, and no plausible physical activity with which to occupy my

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1149232333653116982006-06-02T00:05:00.000-07:002006-06-02T11:45:42.926-07:00

life is spinning in a winding down motion of a merry go round. not the thrill or psychedelic trip of a full on spin but the inbetween when you're not sure if the world is going to materialize the way it was before, or if all those beautiful, awing fragments will click into the thing you caught a glimpse of moments ago.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1148275441240525732006-05-21T22:08:00.000-07:002006-08-31T10:57:41.120-07:00

Spiders numbered as many as stars in the jet black sky. Little ones with big fat hairs, big ones with long slender legs, striped ones, jumping ones, many, many spiders. Most seemed unconcerned about their impending doom, but a few frantically skittered away as we rolled up the oversized tent. I hurried a few along to safety then watched as one after another became nothing more than skid marks on

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1147763454793664862006-05-16T00:05:00.000-07:002006-05-16T00:10:54.803-07:00

I have 12 feet of laces in my boots.Kevlar reinforced laces don't actually stop bullets from entering the foot. They also break about as quickly as all the other crappy laces, even without bullet holes.Boots kick ass. Unless they don't fit me. In which case, they suck ass.If I was starving on a life boat and it came down to eating my boots, I'd eat the boat instead. I love my boots too much..

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1147156421904955502006-05-08T23:16:00.000-07:002006-05-10T22:53:28.863-07:00

The door bell rang and I sat frozen in midbite at the table. My perfectly cooked eggs and crisp quesadilla were warm and cozy, floating on a wonderful blanket of grease and ranchera salsa. I shoveled a few more bites into my mouth and relunctantly went to see who it was. I should have known better. No one I like ever knocks, let alone rings. Come to think of it, there are a few I don't like so

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1147154376856426902006-05-08T22:48:00.000-07:002006-05-10T15:44:41.796-07:00

There is an unwritten law, a sort of instinctual knowledge about dusty wooden cigar boxes. Whether they are white with gaudy paint and naked Indians or plain branded wood, no matter if they slide open like a supernatural puzzle or clasp tight, the contents are always full of promise and mystique. Long after the last tobacco torpedo has been extracted, neatly clipped, chewed and sucked, the box

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1146206401117425812006-04-27T23:22:00.000-07:002006-04-27T23:40:01.136-07:00

procrastinate and playpluck away at the tensionsi tune it up to my own e or amy own g stringtwisting up winding downgoing further from any standardtuning him to me or me himor him to himselfjust some relative invervalstweeking and stretchingjust rightand then one daysnapand it starts all over again

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1145001371068539812006-04-14T00:27:00.000-07:002006-05-06T08:53:27.050-07:00

i just ate nearly half a box of girl scout cookies while playing cribbage online and giving advice about home brewing. of course online i made it sound like i knew all about brewing, neglecting to mention that it's Sy that does it all... i just help so i can drink as much as i want. then dude said he was thinking of making beer in a 2 liter bottle... yeah anyway... you know the angel and devil

Maybenoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1144792019411206162006-04-11T14:14:00.000-07:002006-04-11T22:10:40.716-07:00

Gripping the steering wheel with eyes wide, knuckles white. "SHUTUP!!!!!!!!!!" What I really want to scream is "SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING LITTLE SHIT!!!" Telling, asking, reasoning, threatening, bribing.... multiple times with no effect, gradually increasing in annoyance and anger, day after day, different situations, same old shit. Suddenly rage erupts, I see red, I long to externalize my

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1144135247117438402006-04-04T00:10:00.000-07:002006-04-10T20:29:58.880-07:00

i'm feeling the sin wave of time lately. it fluctuates not so much in an up down sort of way though. rather the styles swing around. i've been driving the van, listening to the mini boombox playing whatever radio station it can grab at over it's perch a top the 8 cylinder engine. all the cabinet doors rattle and sway with every corner i crank the old steering wheel around. i'm feeling it.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1143096075332360202006-03-22T22:40:00.000-08:002006-03-22T22:41:15.346-08:00

this week he favors dried mango and jam sandwhiches on bread. i don't really understand the texture thing, but he's digging it.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1140542611627982882006-02-21T09:21:00.000-08:002006-02-21T16:16:32.800-08:00

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1140330848227520432006-02-17T16:36:00.000-08:002006-04-10T20:32:13.113-07:00

That's right. The Van of Doom no longer is taking up room in my backyard. It's off to the mechanics for a major overhaul. It is to become the new Spazmobile. I can't believe I'm going to be driving around that monster. It'll be fun. All it needs is engine work, brakes, air conditioning, seats, insulation, carpet, paint, a propane fridge, curtains, and a booming stereo and it'll actually be pretty

Maybenoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1139980957528905742006-02-14T21:01:00.000-08:002006-04-05T02:13:26.933-07:00

SY gave me a card in Spanish this year. I typically can't swallow the store bought and packaged words in those greeting cards. They've always seemed ingenuine, lazy and cowardly. I realize that these are cruel sentiments to have towards an item given with good intentions, but nonetheless... anyhow, when the message is written (long lengthy proclamations of the soul and the heart and life etc...)

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1139553929337276222006-02-09T22:40:00.000-08:002006-02-09T22:48:38.470-08:00

Finally I have a new turntable to love. So I pulled out all the albums that I've been missing for so long now. I still have to get one last shelf cut and hung before I can finish the closet of funk, but I'm so close I can almost hear the Chemical Bros. I picked up today.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1139377595451510442006-02-07T21:43:00.000-08:002006-02-08T16:44:55.396-08:00

I love her already.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1139271712249743722006-02-06T16:03:00.000-08:002006-02-07T21:42:32.340-08:00

Or something like that. I'm losing count. On the up side we got to go hiking on the mountain, up roads that are usually snowed in this time of year... I'd rather be sledding there and having snowball fights instead of hiking and picnicing, but oh well. At least there is still a little life on up in that elevation. Here in the valley everything is brown and dry and dead... unless someone gives

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138863571965753332006-02-01T22:58:00.000-08:002006-02-01T22:59:31.966-08:00

New photos posted in my brag book.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138863353441804582006-02-01T22:50:00.000-08:002006-03-27T06:40:11.193-08:00

Against my better judgement, I went clothes shopping today with, yes both, the boys. Now shopping is something I normally detest. Throw in a screaming newborn, a rebellious child, and some leaky tits and it's not a pretty picture. But after extracting promises of good behavior with both threats and bribes of ice cream, and emptying said tits into crying baby, we headed into a second hand store in

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138151941340949462006-01-24T17:18:00.000-08:002006-01-30T00:19:56.720-08:00

Dryer than a bone down here.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138085118709420652006-01-23T22:37:00.000-08:002006-01-26T15:09:03.873-08:00

my little car is dying faster than that opossum you saw in the street. apparently trade in value on the old girl is $165. wow. that's depreciation for you. i think i could get 200 or 300 if I sell her outright. sure the clutch slips, the seats are ripped, the stereo blows, you can't lock the doors, the trunk doesn't work, the engine mounts are actually broken and the axels are screwed up, but I

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138038591052433562006-01-23T09:48:00.000-08:002006-01-23T09:52:20.613-08:00

after talking to the anatomist I had to check out wierd USB drives. Here's a website that has some cool ones

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1138035924226658232006-01-23T08:57:00.000-08:002006-01-23T09:05:24.250-08:00

The good news is my bike is running strong once again. The bad news is I can't fit into any of my leather jackets. Not even close. It's depressing, but not as depressing as being grounded. I have no idea where to find my gloves, haven't seen 'em since last winter, my leathers don't fit, my helmet blows, but I'll be riding anyway, a biker-cicle. SY's jacket does fit me at least, but it's got

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1136870401061328202006-01-09T21:04:00.000-08:002006-01-09T21:20:01.086-08:00

i'm tired. leaving the house involves a mental checklist that rivals any camping list of the past. there is entirely too much to do, every day i'm just trying to catch up. i hate fucking ketchup. and i really need my god damn motorcycle to be running right now.i have to keep in mind the things i love that are around me to stay sane. i love my flannel nightgown, my cozy corner of the house to

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1136162458251761992006-01-01T16:25:00.000-08:002006-01-01T16:40:58.316-08:00

Reflecting back on 2005....It was good for me, if not good to me. Or maybe it was the other way around. Whatever.The year started with a hangover in Mexico. Spring semester - a full load of promising classes, which turned out to all be very lousy, but got through them well enough and planned to move onto the next college in the Fall. Haha.Got knocked up in February, went to Oregon for a great

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1135356691734322262005-12-23T08:40:00.000-08:002005-12-23T08:51:31.800-08:00

The whole thing wreeks of effort. I love getting presents as much as the next guy, but all the uproar to celebrate the birth of a dude who died over two thousand years ago? Even if he was cool enough to claim to be a demi-god? Yeah, I'd rather just sleep all day. Suddenly I'm coming down with a very nasty case of the flu.... except River would be very bummed if I played hooky from Christmas.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1135110465040856012005-12-20T12:25:00.000-08:002005-12-20T12:27:45.043-08:00

For anyone who wants to see how obsessive a parent can be with a camera, check out http://www.flickr.com/photos/75562767@N00/ . There are some new ones on there. Anatomist was awesome enough to sponsor a membership, so now the pictures are large enough to view without the aid of a microscope. Thanks Love!

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1135110276746846152005-12-20T12:20:00.000-08:002005-12-20T12:24:36.746-08:00

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1135110031128668552005-12-20T12:19:00.000-08:002005-12-20T12:20:31.130-08:00

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1135109931145473572005-12-20T12:17:00.000-08:002005-12-20T12:18:51.176-08:00

Me and my baby. Mostly I just sit around and stare at him.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134589782612007002005-12-14T11:33:00.000-08:002005-12-14T11:49:42.686-08:00

So I've got this theme song blazing through my brain. It's the "Together Again" song that the Muppets open one of their movies with. In my head all the Muppets are dancing around in a bar with big beer steins singing to me about my reunion with beer. Ahhhh. "Together again. Gee it's good to be together again. I just can't believe that you ever were gone. It's not starting over, it's just

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134450786529168012005-12-12T21:11:00.000-08:002005-12-12T21:13:06.540-08:00

So I am to busy to deal with posting here. Check out http://www.flickr.com/photos/75562767@N00/I hope that link works...

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134348601375062162005-12-11T16:46:00.000-08:002005-12-11T16:50:01.390-08:00

At 6:43 Jordan Justin S. entered the world weighing in at 6 lb 14 oz and 19 1/4 inches. I was in labor for 6 hours, (which went by very slowly at times), and pushed for just 13 minutes (according to the midwife). All in all I got off pretty easy. Healthy kid and I'm feeling great, especially two glasses of champagne later. More details after some sleep.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134294250766189752005-12-11T01:42:00.000-08:002005-12-11T01:44:10.776-08:00

Unless I'm just going to go through some intense contractions for nothing.... Then this is it. 2:43 in the morning and I'm not making any phone calls yet. But it just could be.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134273412981897692005-12-10T19:39:00.000-08:002005-12-10T19:56:52.996-08:00

I think I must be about there. I'm bitchy, moody, forgetful, and bitchier. And huge. My midwife called today to share her concerns about late labor... which I didn't want to hear. Placenta deteriorating, won't do homebirth after 42 weeks (still eight days away!) blah blah blah...She told me to get some herbs and do natural induction. I would prefer to have everything just go by itself... but

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134146535778041162005-12-09T08:38:00.000-08:002005-12-09T08:42:15.793-08:00

It's so awesome when payday hits and my account is actually in the black. I ignore the fact that it is only so because I overdrew into my savings account... again. But what the hell. It's not like I really have 25 bucks a month going away for retirement anyway. Just what I do have for retirement, I'm not sure. That's why we have kids right? So we'll be their problem? Hope my parents aren't

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1134002331961528612005-12-07T16:36:00.000-08:002005-12-07T16:38:51.973-08:00

It's very odd to sit around with someone, drink tea and bullshit for an hour and then strip down and prepare for the rubber gloves, get dressed again and go back to tea and bullshit. That's all.No progress. The baby's not coming today.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1133971092499816362005-12-07T07:48:00.000-08:002005-12-07T07:59:20.290-08:00

No one believes that it gets really cold in Toostoned, and I guess if you're from Minnisota or Wisconsin, cold doesn't commence until the negative digits, but it's every bit as cold here as in the Mudhole. Thing is, every year the summer heat lingers until late November and then, bam, in a week the temperature plunges fifty degrees. The effect is one of hurtling oneself bodily from a sauna to a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1133759961405785352005-12-04T21:10:00.000-08:002005-12-04T21:19:21.420-08:00

Well, now all the days are all crossed off the calendar and it's rather anticlimactic. Of course I know that the "due date" is just an estimate, but still... My mother or father or the inlaws call every day to see if we had a baby... as if we'd forget to call and let them know they're grandparents of yet another kid. One of these days.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1133544114977719902005-12-02T08:59:00.000-08:002005-12-02T09:21:55.036-08:00

My piece of shit car is in the shop, awaiting seatbelts. Apparently it's not so easy to find the old-school lap belts without the horrible shoulder straps. But anyway, I'm rather homebound for the time being, unless I resort to the Tucson bus system, if system it can be called, I'm not sure it qualifies since there seems to be no method to the madness. And I'm not biking around nine months

Maybenoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1133150155036110942005-11-27T19:51:00.000-08:002005-11-27T19:55:55.036-08:00

By the slow count I'm down to one week. I keep trying to tell myself to be patient. The kid is a lot less work when it's inside. No diapers, feedings, etc to worry about yet. I should enjoy the last days of freedom. But it's damn hard to wait. I sort of feel like I'm waiting to get my arm cut off by a dull saw with no anethetic. I dread the pain and wish it were behind me already. But

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1132974223077768482005-11-25T18:58:00.000-08:002005-11-25T19:03:43.086-08:00

I ate four pieces of pie today. I made six pies total, gave one away, took five with me to Thanksgiving dinner and came home with two. Now we're down to one. I think I might be sick. But it's soooo good. I think pie is even better than cake. I must be living out some stoner wish made years ago while smoking dope behind the YMCA or something, granted 12 years late.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1132855733627006732005-11-24T10:00:00.000-08:002005-11-24T10:08:53.640-08:00

Having axiously awaited the return of the midwife, wondering what the hell I would do if I went into labor while she was out of town, I was relieved not to have to spend last weekend finding out. And so Monday passed, no baby. River's birthday and then yesterday making pies.... nothing. Now it's Thanksgiving and since River was born a butterball turkey, I am convinced this one is destined to

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1132462071904576792005-11-19T20:28:00.000-08:002005-11-19T20:48:53.740-08:00

He licked the batter off the spoon carefully for about an hour. It was the only taste of birthday cake he'd get tonight. Better make it last. Making a birthday cake is a special tradition in my family. My mother is the best cake baker I know. I can't do 'em like she can. She'd let us choose any cake we wanted, and the shape of it besides. I remember a duck shaped cake when I was a kid, and a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1132013053895099262005-11-14T16:00:00.000-08:002005-11-14T16:04:13.910-08:00

There is nothing like bread right out of the oven. It's nice to have the time to bake all day. Tonight's menu, corn pudding, whole wheat honey challah, and salad. River wants chocolate cake for his birthday. They don't seem to sell cake flour at the stores around here anymore. I guess they figure everyone just does a box job. I'm going to make him a Mexican chocolate cake with maple

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131907739346213252005-11-13T10:35:00.000-08:002005-11-13T10:48:59.400-08:00

So I've reached "full term" as they say. No half baked baby here. I find myself looking forward to labor the way I looked forward to 24 hours in jail. No, not that bad. If I were going to go to the hospital for birth, the experiences would have more similarities. But it's just going to be here in my cozy nest with people I trust and love. And I'll be in charge. I hate having people tell me

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131774512921089972005-11-11T21:39:00.000-08:002005-11-11T21:50:13.336-08:00

i think rubber cement would be an awesome name for a band. speaking of cement, i've decided that i need to become more intimate with the stuff. sometime after the new year i think i'll have an official cement week, in which i buy several bags of the stuff and spend a day sculpting it, building shit out of it with all the small rocks in my yard, and generally playing with the stuff. hmmm. maybe i

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131687817719205432005-11-10T21:40:00.000-08:002005-11-10T21:43:37.730-08:00

It is very dangerous while pregnant to stumble across the website for Euphoria Chocolate Company. I almost spent half my measly paycheck to get wine filled truffles and baking cocoa shipped to me in insultated packaging. So close, but I think I'll drop a few hints to my mom and see if she'll bring me a ton of chocolate when she comes in a month. Chocolate is like heroin for dogs they say. I'm

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131419485581117712005-11-07T19:05:00.000-08:002005-11-07T19:11:25.593-08:00

I'm sure every mother feels her child is pretty awesome in some way or another. But when River and I were driving with Synchronicity blaring today and he was singing along word for word I felt a little closer to him. I'm liking very much the person he's turning into, from his music tastes (which I'm sure will be a short lived apreciation) to his mannerisms, iterests etc... It's nice when the

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131341231737621762005-11-06T21:24:00.000-08:002005-11-06T21:27:11.750-08:00

Today I like the name Symon. The "y" because names with y's in them are superior. If I come up with a new name that I don't hate every day, perhaps I'll have something to name this kid when it arrives. PS posterior pelvic pain is a fancy way of saying that you have much pain in your ass.

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131234935155749282005-11-05T15:49:00.000-08:002005-11-05T15:55:35.166-08:00

Minion wanted to fill full time position. Do you have good taste in movies? Can you mix a mean Bloody Mary? Do you know how to make stoner popcorn? Can you drink like a fish and still function on a surprisingly adept level? Then this is the job for you! All applicants must have dark sense of humor, have at least ten years experience in the art of flattery, and have the motivation to

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1131216637899471572005-11-05T10:40:00.000-08:002005-11-05T10:50:37.913-08:00

I plan on doing nothing today but trying to convince people online to come pick up the worthless shit I cleaned out of my shed last weekend. I love freecycle.org. SY took River to run errands this morning and so I got to sleep in 'til ten. Yes, it's sad that this is sleeping really late for me these days. But soon sleeping at all will seem like luxury. Now the boys are off at a football game

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1130906318537026972005-11-01T20:37:00.000-08:002005-11-01T20:38:38.550-08:00

just thought the world would like to know that i have it all figured outnow i hope i don't get bored with my infinite wisdom

Maybenoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1130797461995538012005-10-31T14:14:00.000-08:002005-10-31T14:24:22.010-08:00

Most ridiculous tips found online today for pregnant women in their 35th week.Tip #1 If your belly button has popped out, try sticking a piece of tape or a bandage over it. -??? like I give a shit if I have an outie for awhile ???Tip #2 (for the guy) if she's not in the mood for sex, paint her toenails instead. she'll want pretty nails in the hospital - this is some sort of turn

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1130477522366632192005-10-27T22:19:00.000-07:002005-10-27T22:32:02.376-07:00

good fenced make good neighborsa saying that i always found to say a lot about western cultureas i get older and my tolerance of others decreases, i relate a bit more to this need for spacial boundariesin my lair with the door shut, i feel like i'm inside of a russian dollthe kind you open to find a smaller version contained withinand one in thatand so onin my most inner sanctum i breathe the

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1129580051916127122005-10-17T12:39:00.000-07:002005-10-17T13:14:15.950-07:00

Seven weeks. I am thinking I will have a theme for every week to make the time go by faster. This week's theme is olives. I should be finishing up the initial stages of the water soak and moving into canning and brining. Oh boy. Still a ways from edible, I may have to supplement my diet with some store bought ones.The baby flipped from a transverse or sideways position to the head down mode,

Maybenoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1129483900876259122005-10-16T10:22:00.000-07:002005-10-16T10:31:40.886-07:00

Last year I spent hours painting a corset for Buckster's Mother Earth costume. I just finished, finally, SY's jedi robe complete with a huge hood.Why is it that I somehow spend entirely more effort working on other people's costumes? I never have put that much time into one of my own. Well, no more! Next year I'm going to design and create the coolest costume ever in which I hope to include

Maybenoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1129239364869870732005-10-13T14:27:00.000-07:002005-10-13T14:36:04.876-07:00

As the last vapors of my addictions evaporate, I can feel anxiety fade a bit further from view. Finally, after seven long months, I'm adjusting to sobriety again. Almost. I cleaned all the floors in the house today and went grocery shopping. I feel like some television housewife whore. Actually, despite my utter loathing of cleaning and washing and folding and shit, I am actually enjoying

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1128794926868157312005-10-08T10:56:00.000-07:002005-10-08T11:11:38.040-07:00

Standing in the kitchen on Saturday morning with my two boys helping me make waffles I feel happy. River is on the step stool (naked of course) holding the mixer and beating the whip cream, sampling tastes of almond and vanilla. SY is slicing strawberries and nectarines. I pour batter into the old iron and peel rectangles of squares off minutes later. And finally it hits me. I'd rather be doing

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1128661467445082732005-10-06T21:48:00.000-07:002005-10-06T22:04:27.476-07:00

i'm not quite thrilled about the newest stage of my mural. shit- i've really got to put up some pictures. it's progress, but in a different direction than i intended. a little prettier than i would have liked. i'm not going for a really pretty look. what the hell kind of look am i going for? well, not pretty. trippy. psychedelic. twisted. comfortable. easy. wierd. kick ass. maybe...

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1128097095587908622005-09-30T08:53:00.000-07:002005-09-30T09:18:15.653-07:00

I'm too tired to get any real excercise these days. By the time our evening walk with the dogs rolls around I can hardly stand up straight. So the dogs look at me pitifully and I just read myself to sleep. I hope that chasing after River and doing my ordinary busy work is enough. Last time I didn't get much excersise either. I had the pool then, but I've always been more of a lounger than a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1127414508184652462005-09-22T11:35:00.000-07:002005-09-22T11:41:48.190-07:00

"Mama, I want to paint with your paints." "How 'bout watercolors instead?""NO your paints!" "Okay, fine."I cut out a huge pumpkin shape out of butcher paper and mix up some orange and green paint. He does a really remarkable job painting it. Then we do some leaves."Let's paint a scorpion," he says. So I draw the outline of a scorpion and he fills it in red and black. Then he wants a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1127335728574582332005-09-21T13:40:00.000-07:002005-09-21T13:48:48.580-07:00

My big excitment for the day was going shopping for power tools, or a power saw, to be specific. I love to wander down ailes of expensive tools that could devour a hummer, pick over the thousand of different attachments, wondering just what the difference between this one and that. I was drawn to the saw blades with impressive numbers such as 120 teeth. But I decided size matters more than

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1126806360939410222005-09-15T10:39:00.000-07:002005-09-15T10:46:00.946-07:00

sheep's milk feta, kalamata olives, red bell peppers, oinions, crimini mushrooms, tomato, fresh basil and thyme from the garden. oh yeah. this omelette rocks. bet you wish you had some. oh and the mocha made with good cocoa powder and real whipped cream. i'd take a picture, but it'd be food porn, and frankly i'm not sure the eggs are of age.river and i are off to the desert museum. he's

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1126406286562996242005-09-10T19:27:00.000-07:002005-09-10T19:38:06.570-07:00

I have a tendency to paint the sky more like the ocean. The clouds become breakers, shades of blue and gray swirl in crests. As dusk fell over Tucson, the sky loomed larger than the Pacific and a ring of clouds circled the horizon. They were strange seashells, peach and pink and white on aquamarine water, and cruising down Speedway with my t-shirt blowing up over my large round belly, I felt

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1126222935726601902005-09-08T16:33:00.000-07:002005-09-08T16:42:15.733-07:00

At 27 weeks, this baby's kicking pretty good. We've got onesies and diaper covers, baby blankets and breast pumps, just about everything we need for a tiny person. As the time approaches, I feel less prepared. Did I forget how god awful labor is? Am I totally nuts? No and yes. I just hope when the time comes that I can keep in mind that the whole thing will end we'll have a baby when it's

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1125723443833371482005-09-02T21:43:00.000-07:002005-09-02T21:57:23.840-07:00

white light poured out of my tiny two by two window into the black night. a pilgrimage of bugs swarmed around it in adoration. the congregation caught the sparp eye of a little gecko. i watched him make his way across the glass, his belly shining pale, the light illuminating his whole being. he ignored the smaller insects and devoted his entire attention to a fat moth. he lunged twice and

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1125430831851176832005-08-30T12:05:00.000-07:002005-08-30T12:40:31.913-07:00

I finally have a working computer again, although it took a total brain transplant. Now it has amnesia like a soap star. But anyway, at least I can type in my lair once again. Actually, this room feels more like a broom closet than a lair.My big plan for the day is the library. I am in love with the library now. I figured out how to reserve any book/video/cd I want from the online catalog

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1125344992899429692005-08-29T12:31:00.000-07:002005-08-29T12:49:52.946-07:00

The word "placenta" is the Latin word for cake.The critter is kicking and punching away. It's a strange sensation being attacked from the inside out, even the second time around. We've changed our first choice names for a boy from Elmer to Otto. Seriously though... I'm having trouble with boys names. Is Dante too much? It better be a girl. I think Dante would be a cooler name for a girl...

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1124307708078420312005-08-17T12:32:00.000-07:002005-08-17T12:41:48.113-07:00

It made my day. While pushing River around in the grocery store and wiping yogurt off his face a guy comes up and asks "hey, remember me?" I typically hate this question 'cause the answer is always no, and I have to pause and think about whether or not to try and fake it. This time I just said no. He said "you cooked us breakfast" and then it comes back to me and I finish off the sentence

Maybenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8417357.post-1123693185222034362005-08-10T09:51:00.000-07:002005-08-10T09:59:45.270-07:00

Having lost a perfectly good motorcycle to neglect and disuse during my last pregnancy, I was determined not to make the same mistake this go 'round. I had one of S.Y.'s guys stop by the house and fire up the black beast while I was in Oregon to make sure it would stay ticking. Of course he left the taillight on by accident and the battery died. Grrr. So I finally bought a charger after a

Maybenoreply@blogger.com1